The Best Part of My Day is Gone – My Lab Bailey!
by Donna
(Nebraska)
I lost my best friend Bailey on 10/19/10. She was a 13 year old Yellow Lab who had been with me since she was 6 weeks old.
She was the best part of my day every day! She sat in the front window every day and waited for me to come home from work.
She would meet me at the door full of wiggles and I swear she could smile 🙂 She was so excited to see me it made me feel great!
I’m having a hard time without her. I don’t cry every day anymore but still feel lost and empty in this house without her.
I knew the pain of letting her go would be unbearable but this has been beyond my worst fears.
Months ago when her health began to fail my dad told me I need to prepare myself but how do you prepare for this?
She had arthritis and some hip problems and the last 6 months of her life her health rapidly declined.
The last day I got to spend with her started out great. It was a Saturday and it was a good morning and she was walking better than she had in a few weeks.
That afternoon she had a seizure. I had never seen anything so horrible and heart wrenching in all my life. I didn’t know what to do or how to help her.
Icalled her vet who told me to talk calmly to her and gently pet her and protect her head so she didn’t hit anything.
She said as long as she only has the one seizure we’ll be ok and to call her back if I needed anything. The seizure lasted forever!
When she finally came out of the seizure it took about 30 min for her to know where she was, who I was and for me to see my “Bailey” back in her.
She was very tired and slept most of the remaining day. That night the seizures started again and by the morning she had endured about eight.
My friend came over and helped me get Bailey into the car and road with me to the vets. It was the last time Bailey was in her house. The last day and night I would get to have her with me.
Her vet was able to control the seizures but Bailey was unable to move her back legs and her vet said lets give the medicine another day to see if she can get some movement back.
On Tuesday morning I called again to check on her and her vet said she was unable to get up at all on her front legs and that she thought I need to make some hard decisions.
She wasn’t sure if something had happened to her brain, maybe a tumor or a tumor on her spine. Her quality of life was gone and I had to let her go.
I went to the vets to see her and say good bye. It was a nice day outside so they had brought her out to a side yard and she was laying in the grass smelling the air.
I don’t think she knew who I was but I sat with her for a few hours telling her how much I loved her, how everyone loved her. How much I would miss her and how sorry I was for doing this.
It wasn’t my Bailey…it’s like she was gone already. Her vet brought out “stuff” to put her to sleep and I held her head sobbing and kissing the sweet spot on her nose that I had kissed a million times before telling her I loved her.
She just closed her eyes and was gone. It was horrible and it still is as I type this I am sobbing.
I can still picture everything so clearly and I can feel her fur under my hands. I miss her so much. I know this is a part of life and a part of being a pet owner but it has been the worst part of my life.
How do I cope? Unfortunately not as well as I had hoped. She was my child she wasn’t a pet. I love and miss her.
Thank you for letting me tell you about the last day I had with my labrador Bailey.
I don’t have any advice for how to cope, just love them up while you have them.
